If I could change one thing right now, no, it wouldn't be me but it would be you. What's the point of changing myself when I'm sutck with the same outcome and the same things happen to me? I want to change you but that would be awfully selfish of myself and I don't plan to be. I just feel like walking up to you and telling you what I dislike, what I hope would happen and how you could make it happen but I'm just afraid. I know I lack courage and I can't really say things to people in person unless I'm given the actual time and opportunity. I want to tell you that I want to be seen. That I miss you every moment I have spare time to think. Sometimes, actually quite often, I wish you were someone else. Someone else who treats me the way I want you to treat me. When I'm told something I find it hard to forget about it and when I finally do, it's just a matter of next to no time that it comes back to irritate me. I really do try hard to make things obvious because I've been told to do so. It amazes me how slow you can be. It's as apprehensible as it's going to get and yet you still seem to find it so hard to realise what I'm trying to imply.