Maybe it's a good sign. But just as one thing seems to get better you announce yet another. I've also noticed something a while ago and all I hope is for it to be just sheer coincidence. I wonder what that person can offer. What's so special about that person as opposed to myself? Is it something I can change because I'll be prepared to. I'm really tired but I refuse to give up. At one moment, I say I'll let everything slip and pass me by but then at another I keep reassuring that I shouldn't. My one single mind is giving me two completely different thoughts which continually leads me from A to B and then back to A. There aren't any arrows pointing to a certain direction so I'm left to make decisions on my own; something I clearly do not like doing. There aren't any signals and no navigational tools to help guide me.

So this is it? This is the end of what seems to me like everything? So it doesn't even matter to you anymore? You can forget past things so easily. Are you that forgiving that you've forgotten completely everything? What happened to the things you told me? Have you chosen a new path as opposed to the one you were currently walking? So all the things you told me were absolute lies? You talked so negatively so I thought differently but I guess I was tricked into believing you. I'm surrounded by lies and don't even know who to trust or believe. I've let myself down several times so I can't even believe in myself.

I can't help but feel horrible because the thought of pushing you aside constantly remains and bugs me. Everytime I see you log online, I feel so bad because I actually know what it feels like since I've been through it myself. I guess you never really know how someone feels until you've been through it yourself. Well, I'm glad you've gained something much better and you're happy now. It's true to say that you've gained much more than you've bargained for. I can't still think and hope that you'll return to the way you were before.