Sometimes I wish the memories would fade away and stop making me think back and get upset. It's a bit amusing sometimes when I think why I feel a certain way. It's so immature and stupid but it's something I have no control over. Maybe it's because I envy it or because I'm unaware about what it's done with what I want. The words "You'll look back and laugh at it" don't help anymore, nor do they cheer me up or help me forget about the present. I hate that it lasts so long. I'm worried it'll turn to one of those other things of the past. I want it to be over but everytime I see the smallest things, they make me smile.

I have the smallest amount of hope and a larger amount of pity and disappointment. Why would you do something and pretend like you care? Half the time you don't understand that it's about you. You might laugh and make fun of me but I just want to scream and tell you it's you. No, I'm not having stupid problems with friends. It's you and only you. Your past actions have affected me like this and if that was your aim or goal, be happy. You've achieved it. I just don't understand. Why would you do that when you have something else on your mind? You're so selfish so I don't even know why I bother. No similarities. A million differences. Nothing fits. It should be a thing of the past by now. Yeah, laugh at me yet again, why don't you?

It's a shame that you don't mean the things you say or the things you imply. I'll take it as a thing of the past now. So return to your past, just like you always wanted. Remember whenever you suffer or feel cut or broken, I felt the same way once.