It's a pity that no one can be understanding at all times. There are certain moments where you just don't seem to weigh out all the possibilities. You comprehend peoples' actions the wrong way or just try to shield them away when all they were looking for was comfort and a positive attitude to shield away the negative. I confess I've acted in such a way plenty of times and although I try to avoid it in the future, it's just something that cannot be helped. Most of the time, my attitude controls me instead of vice versa.

I've, yet again, entered the confusion phase where I get confused by every single word or action, and I apprehend things the wrong way constantly. I feel like I'm being torn between two; having no idea of what to say and what to do. I feel insecure and afraid of making the wrong decision like I once did. I've learnt, or so I try, to stop dwelling on such minor things for lengthy periods of time as it does no good but it's just so hard and just not me.

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder". It only applies for certain situations and circumstances. It depends on the person and their personality. There's so many factors that contribute to it that it makes the overall concept a load of shit.

Okay, every time I say this people think I'm lying or saying things to make myself look better and other people, inferior but really, that's besides the point. I hate not being able to control myself and to ignore temptations which has led me to the worst state I've ever been; and that's no exaggeration. I'm not dedicated as much as I used to be and yes, I was once dedicated, according to my standards; at least. I'm not punctual and I'm afraid I'm not reliable either; and I wrote all that bullcrap on my resume. GG employers, hire me fags : (

Well, that reminds me; I have yet another job interview tomorrow at Dulwich Hill. Ignoring the whole reputation thing and all, I just really hope I get hired for once.

Please don't ask me again..